charliesheen230taahm.jpgTwo And A Half Men creator Chuck Lorre is famous for posting a brief vanity card at the end of every episode of his shows (Big Bang Theory and Mike and Molly, as well), and on last night's episode of Men, Lorre posted the following message:

    CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #329

    I exercise regularly. I eat moderate amounts of healthy food. I make sure to get plenty of rest. I see my doctor once a year and my dentist twice a year. I floss every night. I've had chest x-rays, cardio stress tests, EKG's and colonoscopies. I see a psychologist and have a variety of hobbies to reduce stress. I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't do drugs. I don't have crazy, reckless sex with strangers.

    If Charlie Sheen outlives me, I'm gonna be really pissed.


Sheen slammed Two And A Half Men and CBS producers yesterday in an interview with The Dan Patrick Show on Fox Sports Radio, saying that they wouldn't let him return to work even though he was ready.

A few weeks ago, Lorre ran this not-so-cryptic blurb as well:

    "Do not attempt to replicate what you saw in tonight's episode of Two and a Half Men ... Please keep in mind that we employ a highly-paid Hollywood professional who has years of experience with putting his life at risk. And sadly no, I'm not talking about our stunt man."