RGervaisBKingsley021111_02_X17WM230.jpgRicky Gervais has hosted the Golden Globes three times, and at last night's ceremony, the British comedian wasn't afraid to poke fun at certain celebrities during his opening monologue.

Right off the bat, Gervais told the crowd:

    "For any of you who don't know, the Golden Globes are just like the Oscars, but without all that esteem. The Golden Globes are to the Oscars what Kim Kardashian is to Kate Middleton. A bit louder, a bit trashier, a bit drunker, and more easily bought. Allegedly. Nothing's been proved."


Gervais then took a swipe at Eddie Murphy ... who had pulled out of hosting the Oscars. He went on to say:

    "But who needs the Oscars? Not me. And not Eddie Murphy. He walked out on them, and good for him. But when the man who said yes to Norbit says no to you, you know you're in trouble. I love Eddie Murphy. He loves dressing up, doesn't he. Versatile. He's versatile. No, he is."


As for the Hollywood Foreign Press inviting him back to host, he said:

    "They actually gave me a list of rules. I'm going to ignore them, but I thought it would be good to read them out. This is real, ok? No profanity. That's fine. I've got a huge vocabulary. No nudity. See, that's a shame. Because I've got a huge ... vocabulary. But a tiny penis. No, no. Doesn't matter. It works. Don't worry about it. It's fine. And I'm not to libel anyone. And I must not mention Mel Gibson this year. Not his private life, his politics, his recent films, and especially not Jodie Foster's Beaver."


Oh, Ricky.