X17 XCLUSIVE - Britney's At The Montage, Y'all!

* * * You look great, Brit! Keep up the good work!

Much love from Sedalia, Missouri * * *

* * * Holy Sh*t I was number one! :-O * * *

Who cares about this skank! X17, You have to stop making headlines about her! So anoying!

She looks great!

Rather sad that a 27-year old woman has to have a 24/7 babysitter...and her Mother, to boot! Shitney has NO girlfriends, so the only people she's ever seen with are the "hired help" and her parents. That says a great deal about the egocentric, self-satisfied, smug, has-been, used-up, talentless, wanna be pop tart.

Do you think the "Montage Hotel" in Beverly Hills would have let Shitney inside if it hadn't been for her mother? After all the antics she pulled last year around Los Angeles, she's probably banned from a great many establishments.

What's so "HOT" about these rather blurry photos of your "Queen B"?? She looks resembles a train wreck...even from a distance.

THIS IS WONDERFUL AND SHE LOOKS BEAUTIFUL, BUT WHAT IS THE STATUS OF HER MOVE TO THE OAKS IN CALABASAS?

This bitch SUCKS!

SHE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL

She is very UGLY! Oh my god! Someone just kill her already!

Dear Britney,

No one wants to see your coochie or have sex with your nasty ass! Go home a take a bath wash that rats nest you call hair and be a mother to your children you are not a teenager anymore.

SHE IS INCREDIBLE LIKE MARILYN MONROE. I'M SO GLAD SHE'S FEELING BETTER AND WISH WONDERFUL THINGS FOR HER AND HER LOVED ONES. I LOVE YOU BRITNEY! STAY STRONG!

she looks nasty, her peers are all happly marry ,in relationships and their career is on fire right now why she has her parent babysiting her. Why did this woman but a huge mansion when she knows that she will spent more time in hotel than the house. no amt of money, nor material things will give her happiness.

You suck britney spears!

Lynne is such a worn out wannabe. Word here in K-Town is that she is pushing hard for Jamie Lynne to get her ass back out to LA and get something in the works while she can.

What an asshole. This is SOOO LYNNE.

I'd love to see her in a movie again. Crossroads is one of my faves:)

Britney looks very happy with herself lately, it must be because shes in good with her family and loves the new house shes moving into. Calabasas is so much closer to Tarzana than Studio City. She really only wants her kids to have the liberty of being closer to their father, not that they shouldnt be living with her half the time anyway. If you See Amy sounds a bit silly, i like the original cos its a true song.

5:37 I can't belive that she is still pushinh her youngest daughter to come toLA to make cashe that is just horrible. At least Jamie Lynn will soon be 18 ,so she could run far from her disfunctional family. jamie is during a great job with her baby than the women in her life good for her she rasing her child in a quiet enviroment ,so why bring her to LA?

Lynn wants Jamie to goto LA because Britney wants an extended holiday after the tour for fam time.

YEP, SAME FAS EYED, BRAIN DEAD
B I T C H !!

It's good to see they are all pushing her towards a tour she'll never finish. You fans in the mid and later part of the tour had better check the refund policies. Actually, all of you should check!

I selected a New York Times Op-Ed to help young fans understand why they should assume responsibility for creating and solving their problems. One of the best lines in the Op-Ed is the parenthetical observation, “It’s a sad paradox that Ms. Spears fell prey to the culture she was helping create.”

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Op-Ed Contributor
Learning From Britney’s Troubles
By MIA FONTAINE
Published: February 10, 2008

Mia Fontaine is the co-author of the memoir “Comeback: A Mother and Daughter’s Journey Through Hell and Back.”

www.nytimes.com/2008/02/10/opinion/10fontaine.html

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Read it, learn it, live it, love it!

I hope shitney dies a painful death.

The Peeping Tom who took these photos should be arrested.

Britney looks like shit like always.

Agreed! I think we’ll be seeing more photos like this in the future. The photogs can't take photos from the hill behind the Summit anymore.

Honestly? Again, another opportunity for people to tear her down even further. I love it when you all say you hate her, yet you're the first ones on here to post a remark. I'd think if you hated her so much, you'd try and avoid talking about her. SO, you all are OBSESSED with talking about her! Pathetic. And also, calling her a wannabe is stupid. britney turned the Pop world upside down, she is called the "Princess of Pop" for a reason. Britney is very talented, she releases hit singles, amazing albums, and has a huge worldwide fan base. You say she's used up and unpopular, but lets look at FACTS! Christina, as amazing as she is as a singer, isn't Britney. Christina isn't necessarily as liked by people in general, unlike Britney. The majority of you people commenting in here dislike Britney, yet most likely have nothing else to do with your life. You comment on posts, which probably makes you all feel so good about yourself. Yet, you're still a loser, one who has to come on these things because these are the only times you all get to talk to anyone else besides yourself and your mother. Britney, is, and will always be an amazing musical performer and artist. If you guys dont like it, tough. cause Britney ain't giving up her throne just yet!

Britney needs to do a tv show like Paris' BFF so she can find some friends.

Britney looks good, she's doing good and she'll do great on her tour.
To wish someone a painful death is just immature and disgusting!
Have you seen anyone die a painful death big mouth! Life has its twists.. hopefully yours won't be too painful!

And she's still a tard without freedom to do pretty much anything without a group of people telling her to do it! Soon she'll be returning to her rightful throne-the one covered with leather straps in the lunatic asylum!

Theyre pretty twisted Suzi, they think parading around a girl whos still got problems is a joke. Its sick.

7:47 If you fans dont like it, tough.

She will be back on the Crazy Train soon. Choo Choo

Got Penguin?

...LMAO!

If the best you can do is talk about my gift and imp me, thats pretty pathetic.

3 holes open, no wait!

I'm giving Kimmerly's imp two thumbs up! :)

Does anyone else notice something strange happening to the time signatures? I posted below the "Choo Choo" comment and my posted appeared above it. The Choo Choo time signature changed to a later time.

Do we have poltergeist? LOL!

January 19, 2009 9:01 PM
Posted by: Kimmerly

She will be back on the Crazy Train soon. Choo Choo

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Hmm, lets see what happens now.

Wow! 9:01, is able to time travel!

Hmm, my last comment had a 8:39 PM time signature. It contained the imp’s comment with a 9:01 PM time signature.

Maybe it’s gremlins! LOL!

Maybe it's Britney! She dreamed of being a time traveler. Never mind, she was stoned out of her mind in that video. LOL!

Shitney NEVER got OFF the Crazy Train! She's been riding the "short bus" all her life and always will be.

7:47 PM.

Well, you say we are all so obsessed with Britney, so we must be pathetic.

That's so funny since YOU are so obsessed with us being obsessed with Britney. You are worse they we are.

You are sooooo obsessed with us that you had to leave a long winding post about your mental problems and how you love Britney so much, lol.

7:47 PM. You also must have nothing to do with your life since you are here posting about us. Pot calling the kettle black much, lol.

7:47 your daddy fuucked you too hard up the ass and scrambled your brains.

Shitney had another bad boob job. What's this 3 or 4?

This bitch needs to die and take her whole family with her! WHORE!

ETs , spirits?
The very same so powerless , so so stinking dead shit.
No Thanks!
Love :)

ETs , spirits?
The very same so powerless , so so stinking dead shit.
No Thanks!
Love :)

she looks so ugly without make up.she will have this sick face for the rest of her life.no style at all.so nasty looks.skank.tranny

she looks like a tranny.wtf.retire asshole.u not sexy anymore.madonna is 50 and still look better than u

When did it become acceptable in America to whore out your mentally retarded daughter ??

Can she EVER wash that weave? It and her face is so greasy.

And how do you go on a TOUR with small boys? They are never going to bond with their mother. Who does that?? You'd think she would stay with them as much as possible after the abandonment, endangerment and neglect. Her priorities are totally reversed.

4:27 The MONSTER named Shitney does that..............and for her IGNORANT fans its totally acceptable to put her 2 young babys at the BOTTOM of her "to do" list. Lets just PRAY they will NEVER breed....

You people who post here dont no shit. I was the one who made Britney what she is today and will make sure that when she is finished with this tour that she dont ever have to work again if thats what she wants. Everybody is real quick to critisize her parents and the team Ive put back together. You idiots dont no shit about managing the biggest person ever in the entertainment business so why dont you all just shut the hell up and get a job.

You people who think her kids are going on tour with her are just as CRAZY as She is. AINT GONNA HAPPEN... You think K-fed went through what he went through and then hes just gonna let CRAZY take them on tour with her or better yet give up his life and go along just so this PART TIME BITCH can see her boys ???? BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AHAHAHA AHAHAHA AHAHAHAHA AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AABWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ALL OF SHITNEYS FANS ARE DELUSIONAL.....ALLLLLLLLLLLLL OF THEM.

5:06 Jamie...can I have your job ???

When did it become acceptable in America to whore out your BRAIN DEAD daughter ??????????

5:06 Your the one who turned her into a BRAIN DEAD W H O R E ??

wannabe jamie actor on board....not the real thing

Lynne probably felt that Jamie was being a little too hard on Britney by taking away all of her freedom, and got a hotel room so that Britney could relax and just be herself for a while. She probably lined-up lots of cocaine and booze to help Britney unwind because she understands better than anyone the tremendous pressure Britney is under. I'm guessing she also provided a few well hung middle-eastern studs to "service" her daughter since Britney hasn't gotten any in a while. Of course Lynne is videoing everything and will sell it to the highest bidder. Mommy only wants her precious cash cow to be happy!

Re-record? What 19th century world are you living in. It's called "editing". They will edit out the "k" from the word seek. Re-record, sheeesh. So stoooooopid.

8:17

omg ...stop!
just stop...you are describing my dream date....well hung middle eastern men and a bunch of coke?! awwwwe im in heaven. just stop.
lolololol

How dare you compare her to Marylin Monroe? you dumb britard. Marylin was beautiful and oozed charisma and sex appeal. Britney is an ugly masculine looking no talent slut.

I think britneys great... I am a fan... Weather she chooses to do the tour or not, ill still be a true fan.. I think she should be with her kids b/c now is the time they grow so fast, and she will miss all the stages they go through. Its upsetting, but its not her choice. Shes definetly being pushed to do this tour by her father. But i have faith in her... I think she knows she has to do this tour to regain her wealth, and in order to get her kids back she has to show she can get through this. Its alot of pressure, and I know i could never handle that hectic schedule. I really do wish the best for her.... I would hate to be in her shoes right now..... i just hope she proves everybody wrong!

10:57 Is that your opinion or a verifiable fact? If it’s your opinion that’s fine. We all have opinion about this subject. If you have information substantiating your claim that she‘s being "pushed to do this tour by her father," please share your links. I’d like to read your source.

Lots of big stars had some sort of involvement in the election, even some that didn't tote (how this word is used!) the Obama line. One name was never seen! Maybe this line nails it down...
"It has not been the path for the faint-hearted - for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame."
Gotta love that last part of the line!

"It has not been the path for the faint-hearted - for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame."

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Thanks, it's a beautiful quotation.

It’s also one of the important lessons Britney never learned!

Maybe they can change the line to 'If You Seek..Only the Pleasures of Riches and Fame'. Or perhaps not, since it would be so self incriminating.

To all the blind, incompetent brain dead people who say she looks great:

Well these pics are a bit hazy. And although we can clearly see the extreme fugliness of Barfney (No More) Sperms, y'all simply have to check this epitome of elegance and beauty right HERE

http:// www. idontlikeyouinthatway. com/pictures/20081211/britney%20spears%20dance%20studio%20dec%209/1.html

Lovin' it!

You’re a natural lyricist!

She should perform a duet with Alex Fletcher.

His “1980's hip thrust” dance moves would make the tour a hit!

...LOL!

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www.imdb.com/title/tt0758766/

Thanks for the link, 1:35 PM.

I was a little worried about opening it until I saw the date in the url.

I'm just glad she was fully dressed in those photos! ;)

...Speaking of Dancing...

Sheesh! Who nailed Tom Cruise's feet to the floor?

LOL!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=oqlyQZkq2Ug

The Mirror claims that Brit Brit is in negotiations to "write" her life story for £10 million. A source said that if the deal goes through, Brit will somehow put together three to five books in the next ten years. Some source said, "She's kept diaries so there's nothing she'll leave out unless she wants to. Britney will talk frankly about growing up and how she went off the rails. It'll be a gripping read."

As gripping and insightful as that propaganda piece of shit she tried to pass off as a documentary?

I bet Brit Brit's diaries look like the Pee Chee folder of a 7-year-old girl. It's probably all pictures drawn with crayons and water markers. Whenever she thinks a page is really deep, she marks it with a hologram sticker. The publisher should just save some time and release Everyone Poops with Brit's picture on the cover. It'll be the same shit.

My offer still stands britney. If you want me to use my strap-on on you then let me know. I sent you a penguin so the very least you can do is to respond to me. I would love to hook up with you and if we got together we could live happily ever after together forever.

LOL!!

Kimmerly’s imp is hilarious!

Can you say 'supplies her own material'?

Mouse, youve been chasing ghosts. I see you caught up that it wasnt me in another thread talking about a strapon, nor that it was me calling people 'girlfriend' in the other. Juuust keeping you up to date. Thx.

Can you say 'supplies her own material'?

--------------------------------------

Why yes, yes I can!

LOL!

Kimmerly you're a peculiar (man/woman/whatever).
It doesn't matter to me whether it’s you or your imp.
You BOTH make me laugh!

How's your penguin?

One is unintentional. Big diff!

Which one?

LOL!

It doesn't matter to me!

"Juuust keeping you up to date."

I made a mistake when i said that it was not me on another thread when i talked about my strap-on. I meant to say that it was me only that i was talking about my penguin dildo and not my penguin strap-on when i talked about what i would like to use on britney. That way she will no longer have to pleasure herself as she said in that song called "the touch of my hand" where she sang about how she enjoyed masturbating. Please be mine britney because valentine's day is coming up and i have no one to share it with. I am just like you. I am a 28 year old hottie with a smoking body so let's hook up. I promise you that you will not regret it.

Wow I had to go back 5 pages just to find a post bout Britney. Every page needs something about her or her family for us to rip on! Tighten up x17! More Britney posts = more comments = more $$$$!!!!

OMG...LOL!

Kimmerly doesn‘t realize how much material SHE wrote for you to use!

This will save time:

http:// x17online.com/celebrities/britney_spears/

THE SHOOTING STARS
By Robin Abcarian
May 13, 2007 in print edition I-12

“On a sunny spring day, with the sweep of Santa Monica Bay visible from the picture window in her living room, Brandy, slim and blond at 33, sits on a cream-colored couch. The house is peaceful and sparsely decorated, with a Zen vibe. Her 4-year-old son, Adrien, and 2-year-old daughter, Remy, are napping in their rooms.

A native of Florida, she has a master’s degree in broadcast journalism from USC and a self-confidence that would not be out of place for any chief executive of a $10-million company. “I did always have high ambitions,” she says. “When I was younger, one of my favorite movies was ‘Wall Street.’ I totally agreed that greed was good.”

http:// articles.latimes.com/2007/may/13/magazine/tm-papparazzi19

Wow, 6:00. My point exactly to you all. "Every page needs something about her or her family for us to rip on". Obviously, you have NOTHING else to do with your time, so you come on here and talk about lives you'll never get to live. grow up. talking about people isnt going to get you anywhere, so whats the point of doing it?

Maybe BN should watch “Wall Street” again!

I was told someone was bent out of shape because I mentioned her children on a thread. Apparently, nobody reads the Los Angeles Times and it was a secret!

Meh!

Yeah, who doesn't know X17 is a nasty shithole? that's what makes it so much damn fun! Fricking Wild West without a marshal! Go armed to the teeth or go home!

So why in the flyingfuck are you here 624? Or are you so above it all that you merely drift by and make pronouncements from your cloud up high? Yousuckyoufuckingwhineycrybaby!

Shes 27. Nice try.

Yeah, a year off, but everything else is spot on!

Im glad a fan sending fanmail amuses you so much. Maybe tommorow youll start laughing at other ordinary things people shopping in a supermarket.

6:24 PM That’s right, cling to your fallacious reasoning! Keep assuming anyone who wants to discuss a societal misfit and her paparazzi entourage translates into the commenter not leading a meaningful life. Sheesh, you’re a petulant, whiny little fan! Maybe you should stop taking yourself and this blog so seriously. Unless you enjoy boring the hell out people - then carry on!

Scared the damn pup LMAO @ 624~ I remember that!
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627 Nothings to mean at X17!

Outlaw Gunslinger!

You won't get an argument from me.

My hands are in the air! ;)

Viva La Mouse!

Anony! Good evening! I was cracking up thinking about what Brits diaries would be like! Oh the spelling and grammar............. yikes!

Only the stupid ones gather lead heavily! Consider it a mental mercy killing!
'Nothing's too mean @ X17', damn, lots of usable banners lately for X to freshen up with!

I’m sorry about the pup...LOL!

At the time, BN’s freelancers were constantly shadowing Sean Preston and Jayden James. It was wearing on my nerves. I wanted to ask BN how she'd feel (as a mother of two) if the shoe was on the other foot! ;)

Wenz out for a late night drive last night, try stopping at a gaz station, I stayed inside my car why dem paps pumped gas! They iz da bestest frendZ a gurl can have! Sammy boy adjusted the air in my tire agin for me. It makes the hills in the road not so steep. But sometimes I think he puts the air in my head when I am sleepin. Then he givez me dem red bull pills and I get to stay awake and play Britz and Pappers all nite! Itz a cool game and the pappers take picksures and put them on dem tv's. Well time to go see my spawn. I think I will show dem how ta play Britz and Pappers! Vroom vroom

January 20, 2009 6:57 PM
Posted by: My side arms are holstered!

Viva La Mouse!

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January 20, 2009 7:01 PM
Posted by: My side arms are holstered!

Only the stupid ones gather lead heavily! Consider it a mental mercy killing! 'Nothing's too mean @ X17', damn, lots of usable banners lately for X to freshen up with!

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Whew...wiping my brow! ;)

They should be paying you for these slogans. LOL!

January 20, 2009 6:59 PM
Posted by: $0.02

Anony! Good evening! I was cracking up thinking about what Brits diaries would be like! Oh the spelling and grammar............. yikes!

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Good evening, $0.02!

I have a title for her book:
“I’m a Smart Person!”

$0.02 ______Societal Misfit Discussioneer?

LMAO!!!

DEEr DiArrhea,
tadaa i's gotz a nu frend wit a bIg dik an uh pyl a coke! I's thins I's in luv! pa don no dat I's gotz duh keez 2 da chazidee beld so i's gona hav fuun! i's gona bee fukd like amee wen dem scremin bratz cum bi wit dem smely draws!!!! pA sed thays fo mah imuge so i's luk lyk i's be uh gud ma11!1!! i dun h8t mah pa! i's git da balled angree jeww duud ta kiilz hem fo mi!11!
Luv, bRitny spEerz!

Deer Diareee,
Rite Aid, Starbucks, cigarettes... it's seems just another day for me! Cept for my new pink hairs! (I am incongineato!) Dem Pappers fullawd me to Minelenoma Dance Studio in the Valley. I has to be keepin in shape case I do a stage performance or one dem lap dancings?! After all, my new songs er gonna be on the stereo and I mite do doze EmTV wards agin, gimme gimme gimme ! That judge man sayz I cant take the Spawn Boyz out for Brtiz and Pappers no more.
I will think of a game for just me and the spawn boyz to play at home now!

Correction:

My side arms are holstered! and $0.02 are both slogan writers!

LOL Book title!

The second book can be..... "What Was I Thinking?" "No, REALLY What Was I Thinking?"

OMG! I wish I could write brit-geuse...LOL!

714 ROTFL! Very nice!!!

I still think BN's novel about touring in the Cheeto bamblance should still be called 'Almost Conscious'.

My furry friends need attention.

I'll be back in a little while!

Most Certainly!!!! 721! LOL

The second book can be..... "What Was I Thinking?" "No, REALLY What Was I Thinking?"

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...and it would be BLANK inside! LOL!

I could see a ghost writer shooting him/herself in the head with a nail gun just to get rid of the pain, shock, and guilt of transcription duties alone!

And dos centavos' entry looks like the same gw, just before a mental gasket was blown. For a writer, it would be like looking into the face of evil itself! Satan incarnate- in typo heavy form!

Anony, you get the points for tonight! LOL (shaking head....why didn't I think of that?)

How about

'Oh, If You Seek Amy!'
for a title!

Januairy 2008
Dear DireE,
Oh M jus so mad at them peoples! I hadz the funnest game to play wit the spawn boyz! It was gonna be called “COPS AND HOSTAGES”! Only problem is dat, dem damn body gards thot they waz playin too and I was sposed to let dem win, but I waz winnin! So they cheated and had dem E-emtees with the LV leather wrist and ankul bracelets come ova and then they took me hostage and said I lost 51-50! Geewiz I only lost by one point! I think I will have a rematch in a few more days, maybe even gonna have my Daddeee and Mommy play next time!

She will have to title a couple chapters, Blackout!

brb........ fur babies need to see if the snow is still cold.

I could see a ghost writer shooting him/herself in the head with a nail gun just to get rid of the pain, shock, and guilt of transcription duties alone!

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Hmmm, any chance we can persuade her to hire her mother’s ghost writer?

Puh-lease say yes! :D

9:30am/day 2:
As I watch my Queen heroically smoke her 42nd cigarette of the morning, I am struck by her unkempt loveliness! While most stars her age worry about the small, unimportant lings like hygiene and body odor, she blissfully ignores all societal norms. As the burning in my eyes and nose subsides, I begin to recall why hostages identify with their captors so much! She is simply unfettered by all societal norms in fact; i.e. good mothering skills, state and civil laws, education, personal responsibility, and all of those other unimportant qualities. Given that neither one of us care about these things, I think I have finally found someone worthy of my excessive admiration! And being that it is mutual, I seriously doubt any judge will enter another restraining order against me this time! One can at least hope! I just wish they would loosen the pleather LV straps, as my wrists are beginning to bleed heavily now! My Queen just laughs at me and says, 'Ya'll better git used to it, cause Pa likes him some tight leather!'
We laugh and laugh! It's the start of another great day!

Anony, you get the points for tonight! LOL (shaking head....why didn't I think of that?)

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Why, thank you...thank you very much! ;)

But it'll take more than one night to catch up to the two of you!

She will have to title a couple chapters, Blackout!

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On scratch and sniff Jack Daniel's scented paper, of course!

Leave britney alone. She is my girl and if any of you have a problem with it then get lost. I will continue to send her as many penguins as i want until she is willing to meet up with me. I am her biggest fan and she is my idol so suck on that haters. I look exactly like her and have grown a couple of chins along with my armpit hair just to look exactly like her. You wish you were as cool as her and as cool as me.

Scratch and sniff paper in a Brit book? That's like volunteering to pull pins at a grenade factory to see which ones are duds!

The Britarded Ghost Writer

"....My Queen just laughs at me and says, 'Ya'll better git used to it, cause Pa likes him some tight leather!' We laugh and laugh! It's the start of another great day!"

A perfect end to a hilarious commentary!

I loved the name too...LOL!

Do they sell arm hair extensions? I think Kimmerly is lying about growing her own! :o

Sheesh, I still can't believe "Cops and Hostages" spread around the Internet!

LOL!

That's like volunteering to pull pins at a grenade factory to see which ones are duds!
---------------
That factory would require less insurance than her tour! :)

Love the Kimmerly imp!

Britneys hair there is never very long at all. Sometimes its like a shaved shade of black. It doesnt look too bad to me because its at least always almost shaven.

Cops 'n Hostages, seriously, what says it more succinctly than that! Lots of blog jumpers in these parts, so you shouldn't be too surprised it spread like Herpes in a Hilton Hot Tub!

"Cops and Hostages"
I am suprised X17 hasn't claimed the exclusive on it!!

That's like volunteering to pull pins at a grenade factory to see which ones are duds!
---------------
That factory would require less insurance than her tour! :)
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LMAO with tears in my eyes!

The two of you could take your act on the road!

Cops 'n Hostages, seriously, what says it more succinctly than that! Lots of blog jumpers in these parts, so you shouldn't be too surprised it spread like Herpes in a Hilton Hot Tub!

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Watch some crazed fan threaten to report me to the CDC!

LOL!

"Almost Shaven" A Chapter?

Or the F.B.I........

"Cops and Hostages"
I am suprised X17 hasn't claimed the exclusive on it!!

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Well, I can handle Brandy.

Don't forget I have

......................rawhide!

Chapter 12 is 'Soap Nemesis'!
Or so the sources say.

It looks like her marionettes have been working hard to polish this turd in a futile attempt to make her seem normal. And the more cracks she shows, the more they feverishly polish. They are creating a small cottage industry of turd polishers now because of how impossible their task is. So much so that they are even recruiting oversees for experienced turd polishers. But at the end of the day, no amount of carefully applied glitter, spackle, and buffing wax will change the true nature of shit.

Almost Shaven?

Hmm, you’ll have to be more specific.
Her nether region was as bare as her scalp.
Or do you need me to blind you …to remind you?

The phrase “Figmental Bureau of Imagination” makes me laugh every time I see it!

Funny how she still missed shaving other areas, like her face and braided/dreadlocked arm pit hair!

No not the NETHERS not the NETHERS!

FBI was my contribution, but no where near as masterful and artistic as C 'n H!

applied glitter, spackle, and buffing wax will change the true nature of shit.
-----------------
actually.....one of my pups, last year; ate a red glittered xmas decoration and you can INDEED change shit!

Chapter 12 is 'Soap Nemesis'!
Or so the sources say.

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Followed by Chapter 13:

“Unbeweaveable!” (Courtesy of TMZ)

Well, then there's the Gary Larson spot where he asks if his dog was eating bubble gum again!

Only britney understands me. None of you get me at all. I absolutely love her and would die for her. I have grown my armpit hair. I have a lot of acne along with a pink wig that i wear when i go out and show my support for britney. I am also working on my british accent so i can completely become her. Did you ever see that movie "single white female"? That's me. I am transforming into britney and pretty soon no one will be able to tell the difference between the real one and the one who has become her. I know that you're jealous so suck on my penguin.

Gepetto doesn’t have much to work with anymore.

OK the book is gonna have to have illustrations on the first page of each chapter.

The Brown Boots of Death (Sketch of stick figure in a pink wig, running from under the shadow of a boot)

Death of The Brown Boots (Sketch of stick figure in a pink wig, slashing the boots with an umbrella.)

$0.02 Covering eyes B4 reloading!
No not the NETHERS not the NETHERS!

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HA! That’s right, you don‘t want to see THAT again!

Remember what our mother’s told us:
If you keep crossing your eyes, they might stay that way!

LOL!

FBI was my contribution, but no where near as masterful and artistic as C 'n H!

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I know! I think your line is brilliant! :D

People can say all they want about Britney but it will never change the fact that she has accomplished more in the past 10 years than any of these losers will accomplish in their entire life.

Me thinks Gepetto Jamie grinned like the drunken red neck that he is as he watched the Squid Wig and the Fuucking Brown Botas de Muerte try to escape under their own power from the flames of the incinerator. Adnoid's sex tapes were sent to the 'showers' a short time later under his Final Tour Solution program aka Operation Cheeto Grits.

http://faemalia
.org/wiki/view/Faemalia/DrTyme

Kimmerly your penguin didn't make it to Britney, SORRY!

actually.....one of my pups, last year; ate a red glittered xmas decoration and you can INDEED change shit!
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ROTFLMAO!

Stepping away from the 'puter to catch my breath and wait for my eyes to stop tearing!

Help me please!!!!!!!!!!!

851
Priceless: Me trudging through the snow to investigate the twinkle by the pine tree!

Priceless sounds right!

I can imagine you standing in the snow with a look of awe on your face. LOL!

Illustrations...LOL!

How about “Pink and the Paparazzi - Highway to Hell”

8:55
All circuits are busy. Please try your call again later. beeeep beeeep beeeep. click

Were either of you here the night someone asked “Where are you from?“

Every other post said Canada.

I answered “Rigel Kentaurus”

Someone asked me if that was in Finland!

I laughed until my sides hurt!

Leave me alone kimmerly! If my fans were all like you then i would want nothing to do with them! I got your penguin and then i flushed it down the toilet!

You should have explained it. They would have believed you!

You could have told them that Al Gore brought the internet to all galaxies! LOL

Actually, I sort of did. I provided directions to Rigel Kentaurus in the follow-up response and he/she still didn‘t get it!

LOL!

Wow! Brit finally got a redneck to English translator program! I ran 9:16 backwards and got the original text.:
'kimmly, ya'll bes knot uh be uh doggin on mee!1! ya'll fukbuddees alz ax da sam! i dun plaid witchure shaky cow burd til da batrees dun shit owt! i wypd mah az witit an fflush doun tha coke choppin wirlypool thingamagigger in mah safte ruum!

LOL Well if the topic ever arises I will be from Betelgeuse!

“Pink and the Paparazzi - Highway to Hell”
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LOL That will have to be the centerfold!

LOL Well if the topic ever arises I will be from Betelgeuse!
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Rigel Kentaurus would love the company!

"redneck to English translator"
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The Official R.E.T.

I’ve been working at home on a couple of projects and collaborating with a partner in a different time zones for the past few weeks. I’m trying to get circadian rhythms back to normal (my schedule and my husband’s when he‘s on call). I’m sorry to check out early but I hear my pillow calling my name.

You all wish that you had someone in your lives like my girl britney who inspires me to be the best that i can be. She is a role model and a true artist who you all wish you could be someday. I will continue to send penguins to her until britney pays me a visit one day at my home. I expect her to show up at my front door one day because she and i are meant to be together despite what you all think. I love you britney and the penguins are on the way.

LOL That will have to be the centerfold!

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Okay, you're the editor! ;)

9:36 - Blasted typos!

Wait hold the door! I am heading for my star too!!! I will walk out with you!
It was nice to see you! Sleep well.
G'nite

As always, it was fun.

Goodnight Betelgeuse and Anon!

Sleep well! :)

G'nite Anony & Anon

Yeah, gotta go myself! I'm just starting to feel the leftover half of a Rx brownie that fortuitously appeared at my domicile! Proof that the gov can still do some things effectively. Getting hard to type for some reason.
Lesson of the day- Never make your delivery system in the same format as a tasty snack device! Munchies can get too crazy! Circadian Smurkadian Canadian Bacon!
10 minutes to type

MELATONIN 300mcg works wonders! 1-3 nights and back on schedule.

Circadian Smurkadian Canadian Bacon!

LOL!

Goodnight you!

Enjoy the munchies then sleep well!

MELATONIN 300mcg works wonders! 1-3 nights and back on schedule.

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Thanks for the reminder! I think I still have a bottle in my medicine cabinet. If it hasn't expired, I'll take one tonight. Or get a new bottle tomorrow. It has been hard getting back on schedule!

Night! :)

I hope the brownies are helpful.

Sleep tight!

caaahooooolllll!!!!!

Damn, I'm still awake!

Chamomile tea for me and an interesting news story for the rest of you to read in the morning. I loathe the Splash News & Picture Agency for what they did to Heath Ledger (and to a much lesser extent, a stunningly naïve entertainment reporter). The case has ended. A confidential agreement seems appropriate. I just hope the paparazzi were forced to relinquish the profits!

http:// latimesblogs.latimes.com/lanow/2009/01/a-freelance-rep.html

Thanks Britney for having removed all your tattoos.
Thanks Britney for having stopped smoking .
Thanks Britney for having shaved your head again.
Thanks Britney for having retired NOW!
Much Love however...

I wonder how izz that "certain" clown doing this days?

BWAAAAAAA AHAHA AHAHAHAHAHA AHAHAHA TMZ HAS PICS OF K-FEDS NEW GIRFRIEND PLAYING MOMMY TO THIS W H O R E S KIDS BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AHHA AHAHA AHAHAHAHAA

DEAR BRITNEY FANS,

YOU CAN PUT LIPSTICK ON THIS PIG, BUT BRITNEY IS STILL A PIG.

Never really paid attention to the whole Heath Ledger Video upset. So why is the woman being referred to as Jane Doe? I did a google search.... seems the only female freelance reporter was a Lisa Timmons. Interesting story though!

"I didn't realize that being "accosted" warranted suing someone, but maybe I'm still a little fuzzy on the rules for America's favorite pastime. "

Circadian Smurkadian Canadian Bacon

R.E.T Definition: Locust Smurf Bacon usually cured in Cananda.

.¸.·´.·´¨) ¸.·¨)
(¸.·´ (¸.·´ (¸.·¨¯`BJ SPEARS SUXS PAP PIPE