Lindsay Lohan Kicks Off The Weekend With A Bang

"Machete" is blatant Reconquista/hate propaganda. It is instruction to "kill the White man" and you can take over what he worked for. This from a people who did not figure out the wheel. It would be best if the Reconquista people fixed their own country instead of destroying ours. It would be better if the evil One-World government people did not set people against each other.

"Machete" is blatant Reconquista/hate propaganda. It is instruction to "kill the White man" and you can take over what he worked for. This from a people who did not figure out the wheel. It would be best if the Reconquista people fixed their own country instead of destroying ours. It would be better if the evil One-World government people did not set people against each other.

why doe she have on a "necklace" that hangs right at poon level? maybe cause she still wants / needs / attention? look at me, i'm racy!!

i want to band lindsay

Life is so lonely. Maybe you want to check out

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Love you Lindsay, I went to watch Machete last night and you were AWESOME! Ma lady is back!

Life is so lonely. Maybe you want to check out

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YEAH- I'M BACK BITCHES!! DEAL WID IT! YOWEE!! GO LINDS!!!

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Bad people like Blohan should not be rewarded for bad behavior!

Umm Lindsay only had a very small role in the film so to act as if since the movie did well she is back on the map is kind of ridiculous. We will not know until she headlines a film. Machete's success has nothing to do with her. There is an A-list cast which sadly LL is not a member of plus there was a built in audience. Lindsay is lucky she got a part but do not act as if she is a major stay in the film because she is not.

Umm Lindsay only had a very small role in the film so to act as if since the movie did well she is back on the map is kind of ridiculous. We will not know until she headlines a film. Machete's success has nothing to do with her. There is an A-list cast which sadly LL is not a member of plus there was a built in audience. Lindsay is lucky she got a part but do not act as if she is a major stay in the film because she is not.

lindsay just farted and she has big tits

When is Ali going to start modeling and do some acting? She is so much more talented than her big sis. GO ALI!

2:55, I believe that's the necklace Sam gave her and it tells everyone that this vag belongs to Sam.

Alinag can follow her idiot sister right into the same set of problems. I'm sure Dinasaur insists on it.

all of you people who sit at home and blog about celebs are losers who have nothing better to do on a saturady you need to get a life geeks

ohhh weee lindsay just farted and boy deos it stink it is worst than a britney spears or jessica simpson fart damm girl

Ha Ha!!1 Samantha is boycotting Machete!

She is not really into male-testosterone fueled exploitation gore-flicks.

...and paying to see Machete to watch Linds lying on a bare mattress, high out of her mind, in a meth lab?

SR has seen that in real life...next.

lindsay is a dyke

It is pretty sad when your lips are bigger then your career.


Save your money folks there are better movies to watch.

It is pretty sad when your lips are bigger then your career.


Save your money folks there are better movies to watch.

It is pretty sad when your lips are bigger then your career.

Save your money folks there are better movies to watch.

Ha Ha!!


Samantha is boycotting Machete!

Ha Ha!!


Samantha is boycotting Machete!

Perhaps she wasn't invited to any premiers because she's AN ASSHOLE!!!!!

In Machete, Linds is lying on a bare mattress, high out of her mind, in a meth lab.



Nana Sullivan is so proud of her lil' dyke.

A left wing proppaganda filled pos masquerading as great cinema....spare me the BS.

What is she smiles about, her failure.
this is before or after she kicked the baby stroller.

It bombed with barely 9mil weekend, and drew&justin mega bombed at 6mil.
Clooney also failed, people don't want politics or to be insulted by anti american movies, they just want to be entertained.

post 2:52 couldn't have said it better.
Rodriguez doesn't care about middle class hard working Americans cause he is another rich Ahole in hollyweird.
Why doensn't he go cleanup that shiiiithole of country he so proud of.

Lindsey could do SO much better than Sam. I know Sam is an expert at oral but wouldn't you like run your hands, ect all over some really sexy girl with boobs and a nice butt? I guess not.

I would hardly call that barely more then a cameo that Lindsay had in Machete "her" latest flick. She didn't have much to do with the movie. Lindsay has a long way to go to prove herself.

No good choices this holiday weekend.
People stayed away in droves and the lack of jobs among the theater going youth didn't help.

Lindsay got out of a 180 day sentence 145 days early.
13 days but credit for 14 days of jail out of 90
22 days of lockdown rehab out of 90
Is free on an outpatient basis and only has to comply until November 1st.
After November 1st she won't face 30 days in jail if she relapses
The formal probation and random alcohol/drug testing that was supposed to end in August 2011 will end 10 months early.
Her character has a significant role in the box office hit “Machete”
She is featured on the October Cover of Vanity fair were she done an elegant photoshoot and gave them an insightful interview that took place after her harsh sentencing.
Will soon give a post jail interview.

I effin love Lindsay. She may not have made the best decisions, but deciding NOT to go on Dr. Drew's "Celebrity Rehab" was a good one! Good for you Lindsay. Stick to your guns. Hang in there!

Lindsay may not have made the best decisions, but deciding "NOT" to do Dr. Drew's "Celebrity Rehab" was a good one! Good for you Lindsay. Stick to your guns. Hang in there.

YAY !

@6:01
So true not DOING "Celebrity Rehab" was a great decision.
It is a joke.
Lindsay isn't an addict and doesn't have a drug or alcohol problen.
The new Judge is just making her comply and stay sober until november 1st because she got out of inpatient rehab so early & he is up for re election in November.

I am a virgin

LiLo is an amazing actress. I'm definitely going to see Machete. It's nice to see her on the big screen again in a succesful movie.

Me, too, Kensu. It's ok. I've only had 8 etopic preganacies, but I am a virgin, too

Me, too, Kensu. It's ok. I've only had 8 etopic preganacies, but I am a virgin, too

Who cares about this bitch? What about me and my upcoming wedding?

Is she back together with SamRo?

Go Lindsay! Number 1 movie is awesome!

of course a box office hit will re-establish her acting career. people are very positive about machete and her performance in the movie. also good for her comeback ....... being on the vanity fair cover ....... the photo shoot for vanity fair is very glamorous; she looks like a real hollywood movie star.
you go girl!

Oh you are late, it already took place. Everyone in America was talking about Chlesea's wedding.

I want to get laid.

She looks bada$$ in the Machete promo-pics and poster.

I'm so going to see it

Yup, gets good reviews -- Can't wait to see her as The Sister -- I'm sure it'll be great.

Lilo is the EXCLAMATION POINT! in the movie and often that makes all the difference in its success. Like John Turturro in The Big Lebowski.

While the real stars of the movie went to the premier and had big support of the opening, this also ran criminal ex-con loser had to go see the movie like everyone else did! That just shows how important she was- NOT! Did she manage to avoid killing any babies going to see the movie?

Looks like a cool flick.
I'll watch it coz Lohan is in the film. Peeps will always want to see a film with DeNiro and Lohan.

well done

@7:11
She went to see a private screening at Fox Studios earlier this week.
It was the right decision for all parties involved that she didn't attend the premiere.

Kensu, I will lay you. Gotta be better than what I am used to

#1 m a c h e t e
Must See!!

They didn't want the #1 brand damager at the premier! No junkets for the junkie either!

She's great as a stripper, prostitute and hopefully pornstar! Go Linds! And don't worry about the baby in the roadway...it shouldn't have been there!

She should be in jail for trying to kill that babeh

We don't like tinymeat

7 07


Please. Do not insult me.

John Turturro

Ha Ha!!


Samantha is boycotting Machete!

Wow! Good for her! And she definitely needs some credit if Machete does well. A lot of people are specifically talkin about LL in Machete. There's so much buzz created around LL's role as 'nun with a gun'.
Well, she's definitely a brilliant talent.

Ha Ha!!


Samantha is boycotting Machete!

Dina, you are so pathetic with these blog posts.... good grief.

Who cares if Sam sees that movie or not. Most people aren't going to see it anyways. Sam has more important things to do like disinfecting her giant black dildo and restocking on lube.

Dina, a nun with a gun is disgusting and sacreligious... only you monster idiot mother would think that was cool... just as you think her going into the porn industry re-creating lovelace in a slimy B movie is cool. You are one disgusting pig.

report says "welcome to the coolest action flick since Kill Bill"
Welcome back, Lilo!

Check out x17 kissing up to Linds now. Brandy spends months and months bagging her out and now that her film does well she's all over her like a rash. Pathetic.

HEY LINS I GOT SOMETHING FOR YOU?? IT'S 10.5 INCHES LONG AND 3.5 INCHES ROUND!! GIVE ME A CALL.

She did great in the movie..her role was NOT that small people..she played a good amount of parts..her great acting skills are still in her and she gives a good performance in it..shes coming back little by little..give her a BREAK people..also her american pure beauty in vanity fair was just amazing..shes still young and will overcome..GO lilo.

She is a Golden Goddess.
She is definitely coming back.

YUCK!!!

she's a brilliant talent.

Oscar and Golden Globe in 2011.


FOR SURE!

-She did great in the movie(Not even mentioned in L.A. Times, the most important review.)

-her role was NOT that small people(6 minutes, almost zero dialogue)


-she played a good amount of parts..(2-a hooker and a fake nun who licks a really big gun)

-her great acting skills are still in her and she gives a good performance in it(no acting required for LL to lie on a bare mattress, high out of her mind)

Shes coming back little by little..give her a BREAK people (she IS the hardest working person on the planet)

-Also her american pure beauty in vanity fair was just amazing.(once again, Photo shop to the rescue)

-shes still young and will overcome(she has plenty of time for more rehab stints)



GO lilo.

Another RAVE review:

"Steven Seagal is badly miscast as the lead villain, as he shows without question why he shouldn't end up in The Expendables 2... Jessica Alba gets the most thankless role.Not even John Hurt could survive the cheesy climactic speech she has to deliver...

...Most useless and counterproductive is the inclusion of Lindsey Lohan as Fahey's drug-addicted daughter. She has no character arc and barely any dialogue, and her alleged big moments end up being pointless to the overall narrative (yes, you get to see her nude, if that's your pleasure).

Needless to say, the film is relentless violent, with constant shootings, stabbings, and beheadings....."

Huffington Post

Screw the political message and the action-- Lindsay Lohan is naked in it. I'm going. Yes this makes me a shallow tool.

5;40 I'm with you! A nude Lindsey Lohan is a bonus, like an extra exhibit at a freak show.

Machete:

Repeat after me:

whites bad, non-whites good.

But that's not racism, of course, because it's "progressive".

5:48,

If you did not steal people's countries, murder their people, enslave human beings and falsely invade other people's countries and kill their people, maybe just maybe, people would not think you are bad and evil people.
Just saying...

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2010 will be the worst year ever for Lindsay Lohan

blohan SUCKED in machete and all of the reveiws are saying that

blohan SUCKED in machete and all of the reveiws are saying that

Critics are so predictable and irrelevant.

HEY LINDSAY I DID NOT KNOW THAT YOU ATE
AT A DINER CALLED EAT WORLD CAFE ...
IS THAT TRUE A WRITER FROM A FAMOUS MAG
SAID THAT ...YOU WALKED IN AND SAT IN A
BOOTH..!!

rave reviews:

"...Most useless and counterproductive is the inclusion of Lindsey Lohan as Fahey's drug-addicted daughter. She has no character arc and barely any dialogue, and her alleged big moments end up being pointless to the overall narrative (yes, you get to see her nude, if that's your pleasure)."

Good Things About LieLo
1. Nothing

"On the wink-wink stunt casting side, Steven Seagal and Don Johnson are trotted out as a drug lord and Minuteman-style border vigilante, with both vamping as if these roles are their last (cough).

Lindsay Lohan appears as a drug-addicted webcam slut who claims her bad behavior is just an effort to give her fans what they want (double cough).

Trejo, in his first starring role, doesn't do much but fight, caveman-grunt ("Machete don't text"), and make out with every female onscreen.

Machete is made with a laziness that's so overt it seems to be part of the joke, to the point where certain shots are straight recycled from the trailer, including an orgy scene in a pool featuring an uncredited blonde playing the character played by Lohan in other scenes.

Rodriguez has trouble sustaining the kick and clarity. Because there's no real character drama or consistent critique grounding the spoof, when Machete isn't laugh-out-loud funny, it's deadly boring."

Village Voice

Detroit News review:

In "Machete," Lindsay Lohan throws up and walks around naked.

Even so, the movie is not a documentary. It is a high-camp, blood-splattered send-up of a Mexican exploitation film.

"Machete" is a grand excuse for slice-and-dice bloodbaths, abundant gratuitous nudity and over-the-top absurdity. So the film gets some things right.

But it's basically a one-joke exercise heading toward the inevitable big battle between vigilantes and Mexicans. There's lots of gore, flesh and fun along the way, but it gets repetitious.

And what, you may ask, is Lindsay Lohan's role in all this?

That's not really clear. But she does throw up and get naked. So at least she's not wasting her talent anymore."

"The cast is random. The best performances come from people like Trejo and Jeff Fahey, who aren’t A-list names by any stretch of the imagination.

The big-time actors tend to phone in their parts or chew through the scenery a little too much.

Then there’s Lindsay Lohan, who should be an expert on what it takes to be coked up and desperate, but she delivers possibly the worst acting performance of her life.

But you get to see one of her nipples if you look close enough, so that sort of makes up for it."

Machete


"....(a quieter, but no less disturbing problem: Lindsay Lohan, playing a privileged drug addict with daddy issues in a move that I can only assume is some kind of self-referential joke.

Considering that she’s currently in rehab, and that her creepy, pathetic fall from grace lost all humor potential years ago, you’ll pardon me if her appearance here made my skin crawl.)"

"It’s also a riot to see Lindsay Lohan playing Benz’s drug addicted, Internet porn queen daughter. Yes, it’s typecasting, but it’s still funny."

Machete


"Lindsay Lohan plays Fahey's daughter, a budding Internet porn star who arrives at the film's climax decked out in a nun's habit and a machine gun.

I'd say her career has arrived right about where it should have."

"....a slutty junkie with daddy issues (Lindsay Lohan, more or less as herself."

"Machete" is at its best when it's content with showing the longhaired, mustachioed, leathery-skinned, tattooed Danny Trejo stabbing motherf*ckers with everything he can get his hands on, from medical instruments to kitchenware, gardening tools and machetes, natch.

Alas, even action-wise, the flick loses steam at some point and becomes a bit repetitive, if not tiresome."

"Basically, “Machete” reaches its breaking point after about forty-five minutes and there’s still an hour of film to go.

Movies like this one walk the fine line between grindhouse homage and general stupidity. “Machete” crosses that line."

LOL:

"Lindsay Lohan appears as a drug-addicted webcam slut who claims her bad behavior is just an effort to give her fans what they want (double cough)."

Are you kidding?Only 3.89 million and you think it's good?Most movies get more than 20 million,and some more than 40 million.This movie was a failure,people...3.89 is not a big amount,compared to bigger movies,it's small and weak.
She should do porn movies,because her "career" will only be in bad movies in which she is always naked or doing drugs.She will never be in a great movie with a good role,only in bad movies,her career for good movies are over.And i've heard she doesn't appear in the whole movie,only for 6 minutes of more than 1 hour of movie,what a waste of money...
She will never be the same actress she was in the past again.Her reputation is ruined and she's not relevant anymore.She will die stuck in bad movies if she continues breaking the law every month and with her lame behavior.She's already back to her old ways,people.She didn't change a bit.
Number 1 movie with only 3.89 million...must be a joke.What a weak weekend...lol

Haven't seen the movie yet, but I'm going to. I wanna see Lindsay as "The Sister"

Lindsay YOU rock!

This is the perfect week she should do her redemption interview after shes in a hit movie .
Speak OUT about your experience Lindsay

Machete = Awesome!
What's more Awesome?? Lohan in the movie!

I love the reviewer that said Blohan made his skin crawl in a bad way in Machete.

Haven't seen the movie yet, but I'm going to. I wanna see Lindsay as a drug-addicted webcam slut throwing up and walking around naked.

Lindsay YOU rock!

That's great news. She just needs to focus, and let her talent shine through. Lindsay's talent is still intact. Let's hope she's ready for her comeback. Hollyweird and the public love a comeback story. Being on the cover of Vanity Fair and being in star-studded Machete (which opened this weekend and is a box office hit) is a good start.

Brain dead 1:35 PM Less than 1% of all movies get over 20 million people.
3.89 for one day is good but not great.

3:45 PM Beautiful supermodel Ali has been modeling since the age of three.
She will do more modeling when she finishes high school.
Both Ali & Lindsay are equally very talented and busy and gorgeous.

A naked drug addict prone to extreme violence and with severe daddy issues, lacking moral boundaries, and hanging with other criminals. Talk about type casting. She didn't act, she played herself and without much parody.

Why is this washed up whore news?

I am a virgin like Lindsey

Sums it up the best:

"And what, you may ask, is Lindsay Lohan's role in all this?

That's not really clear. But she does throw up and get naked. So at least she's not wasting her talent anymore."

I'm sure that Lohan's ten minutes in the movie made the difference. Can she really call it her movie when she's only in it for such a short period of time?

To almost everyone.

i'm just glad mexicans like michelle rodriquez, danny whatever his name is, and jessica alba are getting work.


viva la mexico! and Happy Labor Day!

Oh god, she’s been posting to herself for 3 days!!! lol

Wishing a Safe & Happy Labor Day 10:11 PM, 11:00 PM and friends!!!

Love the bad reviews, thanks.

11:12

you're welcome. there were so many to choose from!

"Where does Machete deliver? LOTS of bloody violence, mainly the result of limbs and heads being severed by our intrepid anti-hero.

And faithful to those old 70s flicks, they don’t skimp on the female nudity, including a topless Lindsay Lohan (who essentially plays herself in the film -- a wealthy, directionless, drug-addicted internet celebrity) VH

www.worstpreviews .com/images/headlines/temp/temp1736.jpg

Even better:


www.worstpreviews .com/images/headlines/temp/temp1735.jpg

review: Machete? More Like, Meh-chete


"...Michelle Rodriguez as the Mexican Harriet Tubman known as “Shé”, Don Johnson as a ruthless Minuteman, Jessica Alba as a sympathetic Border Patrol agent, Cheech Marin as Danny Trejo’s brother, Lindsay Lohan as Fahey’s camwhore daughter — they’re all pretty great on their own
(with the exception of Lohan, who seems to be playing a bored, wink-wink version of herself in between cigarette breaks)...."

"Though she's a crappy actress, let's face it, who else can play a strung-out, slutty, rich privileged girl other than Lindsay Lohan?"

Hahhahahah thanks for those reviews.

Natalie Portman has been getting rave reviews for her new movie.

Fail again Liehan

Morpheus didn't mention the Yellow pill?


(oops)

Another hit movie. More television interviews. More magazine covers.
Millions of dollars for beautiful busy Lindsay.
I'm sure glad that the haters tell us they're not jealous.

Years of imdb quotes from the failure.

"....Lohan’s character could be excised completely...."

good for sweet amzaing always

^she doesn't want you and never will. You should give up on your life.

why not? september 8, 2:48