Lindsay Slams Dad, Dr. Drew And Joan Rivers On Twitter

sigh. remember when she was an actress?

The thing is Joan is a comedian, but I understand Lindsay didn't think it was funny (still I have to thank her for saying it, bc she brought back Sam and Linds together). Oh and her father is a psycho!

1:13 - LOL! Yes! She was a respected girl in HW (cirka '03-05), today everyone use her to get a cheap laugh!

She also just tweeted:

"the beach is gorgeous today" about 1 hour ago via web

According to L CHAT, that is code for:

"had a hot night of sex with Samantha."

You go girls..only have a few nights left before that silly thing called JAIL is going to interrupt your love fest.

Lohan has her head writer back...Ronson.

smoke more blunts lick more butts you don't need to live your life with your brown eye shut

Leno, Letterman, SNL, Kimmel etc better watch out!!!

Sam and Linds are real spitfires and have put all comedians ON NOTICE that their pathetic lives are OFF LIMITS to any and all satire or comedy.

LAMEBALLS!

Lindsanity the two-time convict shouldn't throw a GLASS at a woman's head and should WATCH where she's waves her FU fingers.

lol shes just upset cause shes going to jail...but its her own fault anyway....junkie!

LOL....as if the A-list L.A. and NYC entertainment circles needed more reasons to shun and snicker at Lindsay (and now Sam, who had been thought to be somewhat smart.)

Will Linds be able to tweet from jail & rehab??

She is so delusional! Why is Dr. Drew in quotes - is she mistaking him for Dr. Phil? Dr. Drew is a MD & went to a top notch medical school. He is a real doctor regardless of what emptyhead tried to insinuate. Who cares if he is a famewhore, who in LA isn't? Sam, care to answer? And the last time I checked, only Joan Rivers threw stones at Lindsay - the other two, as misguided as their actions may be, are trying to help an addict. Her antics only reinforce the obvious need for help.

Why doesn't she tweet directly at Joan? Agree with 1.21 PM it's the work of Ronson.

Why I find absolutely hilarious are the messages to Lindsay to "stay strong".

You would think she was battling some deadly disease or had some sort of a tragedy. Utter stupidity.

The girl shops, tweets and parties on a daily basis. Stay strong for what?

I can't even muster up a sigh.

Lindsay Lohan's Future Prison Mates Can't Wait to Get a Piece of Her

Earlier this month, Lindsay Lohan was sentenced to a 90 day jail term for violation of her probation stemming from a DUI incident several years ago. Her future prison mates are now chomping at the bit to get a piece of the pampered bisexual actress, who is likely to begin serving her jail time next week at the Lynwood correctional facility in Los Angeles.

According to The Sun, inmates at the jail have warned of gangs that are out to attack LiLo, stating that "everyone will want a piece of her."

During her stay at Lynwood, Lohan will be locked up for 23 hours a day in a small cell with a bunk bed and a single blanket. Because of her celebrity status, she will be kept away from the other inmates for most of the day.

Tamara Haley, 38, spoke with The Sun and offered up some advice for Lohan. She is in doing time for heroin possession and prostitution, and says that:

"Everyone will want a piece of her. It will make them famous if they hurt Lindsay Lohan. Or if you get her to cry, the whole ward will laugh and people will love it -- even the guards."

Man..is her twitter pic the best she can look with the power of Photoshop?

Pack it up Lilo!

Haley also warns about the aggressive lesbian gangs inhabiting the prison:

"The gay inmates wear their shirts inside out to let others know they are available. So if Lindsay doesn't want someone to grab her ass she'd better keep her shirt on straight. Women grab each other like animals when the guards aren't looking. It's disgusting."

I agree with Lindsay If anyone speaks or spoke of Joan Rivers daughter she takes a fit.She should this on Celb apprentice
she was a big baby. Lol about Mr Drew and i cant say anything nice about ML

Haley commented:

"She'll be segregated from the general population but where she's going it is even worse. It's the wing where the murderers are. I don't think they will actually be able to get to her, but you never know. At the very least some of those hardcases will try to scare her. They'll scream stuff to her from their cells. I've been in segregation and it was rough. The lights are on the whole time. You hear people screaming all night long. The cells are filthy and kept brutally cold. You get one tiny blanket and that's it. There's an infection going around now. You can barely sleep at night from all the coughing. And there are girls with body lice."

This chick is such a twat. What else is there to say. T W A T

LILO IN LYNWOOD CORRECTIONAL FACILITY: What Life in Jail Will Be Like For Lindsay Lohan


Wondering what prison is going to be like for Lindsay Lohan? HollywoodLife spoke with sources in the know who revealed to us exactly what life will be like for Lindsay at Century Regional Detention Facility, an all-female jail in downtown LA. Keep in mind Lindsay spent 84-minutes back in 2007 at the same facility. But now she’s back to her old stomping grounds where she’ll spend 2,160 minutes, quite a bit longer than her first time around.

1:31 #2 if his that great of a Dr why does he have to pimp to get people for his show. A real dr has a proff office and keeps his mouth shut.

Lindsay will be in her own cell: “That’s for security only. You may recall when OJ Simpson was on trial, he was housed separately. It’s not necessarily that she’ll get better treatment, but it’s just so that she’s safe,” says Steve Cron, an LA based criminal attorney.

She will spend almost her entire day in her cell: Lindsay will maybe get an hour outside — we’re talking about inside the jail confines surrounded by cement walls and barbed wire and a little bit of sun.

Lindsay’s bathroom is in her cell: Just like jail cells you see in the movies. Yes, there are bars, and they have sliding bar gates for each cell. She gets a cot with a metal toilet and a sink.

1:33 agree


It's hilarious how these two nitwits have "reunited" after a year apart and they spend their time crafting tweets to a comedian who regularly riffs on celebrities (it's called COMEDY, girls)...they might wanna do something more sexy & fun, since Bloho is heading off to JAIL in a few days.

No internet or cellphones allowed: “She will not have a smart phone. She will not have a computer,” says Steve. “She has no access to the Internet. Jail is not a place where you get all your toys. She will not have a phone. She will be given a certain number of hours a day where she can use the phone and call collect only.”

She can’t take meds unless prescribed: The jail doctors will make a decision about what she needs. If somebody normally takes Xanax for agitation, jail doctors may decide it’s not necessary.

"Actress" Lindsay Lohan
"Singer" Lindsay Lohan
"Sober" Lindsay Lohan

Her parents can only visit two days a week: They have visiting days for non-lawyers twice a week. She can get legal visits at most hours of the day.

There’s no exercise room: “She’s probably going to be doing everything by herself,” says Steve. “They have weights. They don’t have stair masters or anything running on electricity.”

Lindsay will have a job in jail: “She’ll have chores and she’ll have things she has to do like cleaning things.

She can’t smoke or sleep all day: “It’s a non-smoking facility.” says Steve. “They don’t let inmates sleep all day long.”

how the eff does a 24 yr old already have a receding hairline?

I Agree with Lindsay all three of these people have BIG MOUTHS and should shut the fcuk up

1:44 #1
Ali, get off the internet...and learn how to spell and write a proper sentence.

BUT Lindsanity you should continue tweeting Joan Rivers, George Lopez and any z-celeb who pays attention because being a walking punchline for every comedian and 96% of the public is what you should be really be worried about right now. Simp!

I don't understand why she is still getting so much media coverage. She hasn't been relevant since 2004 and only made one good movie. Can we move on yet?

nice to see her embarrassing herself and airing out dirty laundry via twitter again

Lindsay shouldn't diss botox, she needs a heavy injection herself. She has more wrinkles than most people I know who are in their 50s. lol

Oh, God, she's so embarrassing. Please, linds, step away from Twitter.

Lowhan Mansion

http:// www.la-sheriff.org/divisions/correctional/crdf/index.html

OMG, I'm worried she won't be able to keep up with her Botox schedule while in jail!!!!!!

Why doesn't she tweet the pictures of her new lawyer giving her mom a "pearl necklace"?

god, her face is so annoying

My thoughts exactly Flamingo!

Has she forgotten her passionate causes:

child-trafficking, world hunger, Haiti & BP, Iranian womens' rights??


oh. guess beating a dead horse over a joke made days ago is more important.

Swag Hoarders - The Criminal Celeb Cure Episode

http:// www-hollywoodlife-com.vimg.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/070710_lohan_mug_jail_cell.jpg

think Linds is getting a little excited over the golden showers offered at Lynwood Jail?

When is she going to get a clue about those lip injections?


Or anything else?

ha! linsay funny girl she firecracker crack me up with her joking talk:D

Too bad about her....everything.

Her stupid mother no doubt writes her messages. The dimwit herself can't string two sentences together.
Her Chiacgo lawyer wannabe implied that she was majorly out of it.

All the Lohans are sociopaths.

Lynwood Free Botox Clinic

http:// 4.bp.blogspot. com/_vBzR0c2YYxs/RhpzVxzovfI/AAAAAAAAADY/Hc8ykjXES-o/s320/open_can300.jpg

http:// scrapetv. com/News/News%20Pages/usa/Images/hypodermic-needle.jpg

She designed her "everything"

Bonnie Says: Lindsay Lohan — Your Biggest Crime Is Now Comparing Yourself To A Woman Who’s About To Be Stoned To Death In Iran!

How dare you tweet that you’ve been so victimized by the American justice system, that you consider your plight to be comparable to a 43-year-old Iranian mother of two who has been sentenced to death by stoning for the supposed crime of… adultery.

That’s right, Lindsay tweeted last night, July 7 a link to a Newsweek article about tragic Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani, imprisoned in Iran since May 2006, already subjected to 99 painful lashes and now facing death by stoning, for a crime, that her family insists she didn’t commit. As if adultery should be a crime punishable by death, anyway!

And that’s not the only insanely self-serving tweet by Lindsay. She also had the gall to imply that her human rights have been violated by her sentence of 90 days in jail and 90 days in rehab. “No one shall be subjected to torture or to cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment,” she quoted from Article 5 of the U.N. Universal Declaration of human Rights!

Wow! Lindsay is so delusional and self centered, she actually thinks that her “victim-hood” puts her on par with some of the world’s biggest victims —  women and men ( many innocent) subjected to torture and execution.

It’s clear now that she truly felt justified telling the judge and the court to F.U. with her fingernails and to reportedly call her sentencing judge — Marsha Revel, “a f*****g b***h.” Hey, Lindsay ’s convinced  she had a right to be in contempt of court because she’s practically a political prisoner — she’s implied that on twitter.

Lindsay — you could be the world’s — no, let me say — the universe’s Biggest Narcissist. I’m surprised you haven’t actually compared yourself to Jesus Christ, and your punishment for repeatedly drinking and driving, and then blowing off court dates and alcohol education classes — to being nailed to the cross.

You have no ability to see that you endangered others by driving — actually speeding recklessly — while being bombed out of your brain. You have no ability to see that you were sentenced just like any other non-celebrity human being would have been if they had DUIs and then ignored the terms of their probation.

You have no ability to see that because you believe you ARE more special than anybody else.

Your parents committed their own crime when they didn’t raise you. Your alcoholic father, Michael, abandoned you, then your mother, Dina, put you to work, lived off your earnings and decided to be “your friend,” not “your mother.” She preferred to party with you instead of giving you values.

And on one hand, you absorbed the fact that you weren’t loved — unconditionally — you were loved because you could make millions, get your parents on red carpets and in the press and get the whole family gift baskets and perks galore.

But while you weren’t loved unconditionally you were told you were special, special, special.

So special that normal rules and laws didn’t apply to you. Your mother Dina has constantly referred to you as a child , even though you are now, 24– “This is not fair to do this to my child” — she whined after your recent sentencing. A sentencing that she was too busy to actually attend.

No wonder Lindsay has never grown up  and accepted responsibility for her actions– her mother excuses her dangerous and self-destructive behavior — drinking, drugging and driving after doing both, instead of punishing her.

If Lindsay had been punished long ago for her bad behavior by her parents, then maybe the California legal system wouldn’t have had to step in.

And maybe, then she wouldn’t have grown up into a drug- addicted, self pitying pathetic narcissistic with the nerve to compare herself to an innocent woman who the Iranians want to bury up to her breasts and pelt with stones, until she dies.

Puhleez, Lindsay- the only fear you have of stones is that you won’t be able to get stoned for 180 days  of incarceration.

Grow up, and hang your head in shame, woman! The only thing special about you is how hugely remorseless you are!

Bonnie Fuller - View Poll
Is Lindsay Lohan a Delusional Narcissist?

http:// polldaddy. com/poll/3444990/

Bloho's attitude and dirty laundry reeks!

hey lindsanity reality check - shut the fcuk up already! what a loser.

"stargument" bitch please.

Check out foxnews web site today. They have an article on LL going to jail. They talk about the lesbian jail gangs in the jail she'll be attending. Very interesting read.

Lindsey will go through those lesbian jail gangs like a knife through butter. She's going to have so much fun in there she'll never want to leave!

Lindsay's only real talent is stupidity.

Celebs are kept apart from the general jail population.Lindsay may have one other room mate but nothing more.

The American public is getting sick of this talentless brat.

She's such a moron, it's not even fine. She's supposed to go to jail in a week, and all she can do is tweet some idiotic comments about her Dad, Joan Rivers and Dr. Drew. Does she even live on planet earth of is she so drugged out, she really doesn't understand what is about to happen to her?

The dumb bitch has contempt for all authority.

That's why she needs jail and rehab.

Could STDs be affecting her brain????

Could STDs be affecting her brain????

2:26 and both 2:27 posts, you are exactly right. I cannot believe this narcissistic little bitch has the right to imply her human rights have been violated. I'm pretty sure she has no idea what human rights even are. She has the balls to compare herself to the Iranian women who has already been severely punished and is facing the death sentence. I think the girl is despicable!

- Hollywood directors
- Hollywood actors
- The entire music industry
- The whole fashion industy (minus tranny fashion market)
- Lesbian jail gangs
- 96% of the general public
- All non-racists
- Friends and family of DUI victims
- People who watched her movies
- People who heard her music
- Judge Revel
- Danette Meyers
- All media outlets

I bet some jail employee with have LL stool for sale on ebay in a few weeks.

so, what do you club of Lindsay haters do when there are no articles coming in so you can write the same stuff everyday? go to psycho dad? to Dina? Ali sure isn't going to give you anything. Or maybe, you just head over to Miley and Noah Cyrus articles.

3:38 please add to haters list:

Mark Ronson
Charlotte Ronson
Ann Dexter-Jones
Mick Jones
Judge Judy
Emanuel Ungaro
LAPD
MADD



thank you.

LOL:

"Actress" Lindsay Lohan
"Singer" Lindsay Lohan
"Sober" Lindsay Lohan

-posted by "Dr." Drew

take a bow!

4:00pm, is that the best you can come up with? Don't worry about the haters running out of material, Lindsay will make sure there are stories about her printed every day. I swear, some Lindsay supporters can be as pathic as their idol sometimes.

As the starlet gets ready to serve time behind bars – she has until July 20 to surrender to authorities – she's turning to self-help books to assist in turning her life around.

Her first must-read: Toxic Friends: The Antidote for Women Stuck in Complicated Friendships.

Lohan, 24, was spotted carrying the book in L.A. Sunday night, just hours before she and her ex-girlfriend Samantha Ronson met up.

While Lohan is juggling her legal woes, she's focused on improving her quality of life – particularly her social circle. "Lindsay's cleansing herself of all the toxic influences in her life," says the source.

And one way she's doing that is reading the book, which helps people "figure out which [friends] you should keep and which ones you should rid yourself of," adds the source.

ISN'T THIS ABOUT THE 18th TIME SHE HAS ANNOUNCED THAT SHE IS WEEDING OUT THE BAD FRIENDS AROUND HER???

4:32 PM 'Bad friends' must be a euphemism for herpes

How can she weed out bad friends 18 times? She only has 2 friends (My Little Pony and The Crypt Keeper).

I hope things are good and strong enough between LL and SR now so that sam will be waiting for LL when she gets out. I hope it doesn't make them drift apart and LL doesn't come out with a new life and is brainwashed etc.

I bet they are having sex every day until 20th.

"To answer everybody's question ... My new year's resolution is to stop letting the lucky few that have my heart, try2constantly tear me down.

2010 is about moving forward, not backwards. Leaving the bad (people, habits, and negative energy behind) time to make changes-right!?!? (sic)"

Lindsay Lohan, January 2010

move away from paparazzi central,stop calling them and start acting like a grown up hohan , watch how quickly you'll no longer get any press,oh but you already know this,that's why you'll never do any of those things.attention whore.
you are not a "star" you're a trainwreck,a joke,get it straight.

apparently that Attention deficit problem makes her forget that stuff she says about every 30 minutes or so 4:46pm.
Ya think?

we love you lindsey - hang in there. everything is going to be ok.we only hope that michael lohan will stop airing ure private matters on all the talk shows. he is one hell of a nightmare. good luck and God bless.

The smart ones were the ones who weeded Liar-Lo out of their lives long ago.
Talk about toxic,that nutjob is poison!

^and this is from a ADHD person who used to take adderall (and Zoloft) and decided against the adderall because it dulled "my effect"!

Lindsay's awesome. I wish her all the best!

Posted by: Anonymous
we love you lindsey - hang in there. everything is going to be ok.we only hope that michael lohan will stop airing ure private matters on all the talk shows. he is one hell of a nightmare. good luck and God bless.
***************
ENABLER, SYNCOPHANT, SUCK A$$.
YOU ARE GONNA KILL HER. ITS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!

Posted by: Anonymous
Lindsay's awesome. I wish her all the best!
*********
Killer....toxic killer....You just want her FAME...It is HERS...NOT YOURS!!!
LEECH!

Lindsay is not a dumb ass. She's actually rather smart. Give her some credit.

Oh, she's so smart. Look at how she threw everything away to screw people over and do drugs! She is a complete waste of air!

yeah, so smart. FU manicure in a courtroom says it all. That is not just dumb, that is borderline retarded.
suks to be her.

Ali at 5:07....go eat your HAY!

she's so smart that she couldn't figure out what once a week meant.
so smart she got herself a jail sentence.

Lindsay is the definition of "doesn't get it".
"Rather smart" more like extremely stupid!
Just how pathetic her lies are,point out how clueless she is,"stolen passport","working","scram didn't go off"..yeah ok.

Too bad about her....everything

You good for nothing demonic no talent white trash whore. Lindsay if there is anyone who should watch her mouth it is you bitch. Humility is something that you should have learned a long time ago loser. Despite people like robert rodriguez saying that you light up the screen everytime that you are on it you still are a talentless little twat who deserved to get punched out by that waitress who dropped you with one shot. Yeah you light up the screen alright. That's probably why you are not even in the movie trailer for machete that is currently in theaters. That guy who is the head of a studio who said that he would rather marry you then make another mel gibson movie is an idiot. No one in their right mind would ever want to marry you or have kids with you bitch. Do your remember michelle pfeiffer's character in scarface? That's you! You are the drug addicted alcoholic who probably has a womb that is so polluted that if you were to ever have a kid it would resemble something that was straight out of a horror movie. Picture the elephant man as a baby and that is what a lindsay lohan baby would look like but with fas and a cigarette in its mouth. You are single handedly responsible for all of the hatred that exists for you and if you have the audacity to try to weasel your way out of going to jail then you can pretty much take it to the bank that the vitriol that exists for you will only increase. If the combination of going to jail next week and that story about you being millions of dollars in debt to people who if they do not her their money they will seek to have you thrown in jail does not scare you then nothing will. You trying to be a comedian on twitter will not alleviate you of all of your mounting debt and problems bitch. Smirk all you want lowlife but at the end of the day it is your detractors who will be the ones who will get the last laugh bitch.

Linds gets to grovel for Sam again tonight....HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6:07

pass the Lysol

what a bunch of psycho's! leave the girl alone already. lindsey, hang in there and don't listen to all this psycho bullsh#t! there's some scary screw balls out there.

6:07 WRITE A FRICKIN NOVEL WHY DON'T YA DOUCHEBAG!

1:44 #1 Loser. If you can't figure that out yourself, too bad.

DIE 6:07! What.... an a-hole! Hate much?

Hey ass wipe at 5:20, I'm not Ali. Are you some kind of idiot that really thinks the Lohan's care about logging on to read your stupid comments? I'm just a fat ass slob that loves Lindsay!

Hmmm, take Lindsay's 90 day's, subtract Michelle Rodrigues at 180 days but doing 17, add Paris Hilton getting 45 and doing 23, take into account even more over population in LA and Lindsay being a non violent criminal needing a private cell. My guess is 4 days. Love it, 4 days and her first interview after will be for over $1M. My monitary guess on her incarceration stay equals cha-ching! Can you fathom $250K per day just for the first interview?

6:56, I dont think these haters could make $1M their their entire lives. Who cares what they think. Most of them have or will pay to see LL in a movie sometime in their lifetime. Can any of them accomplish that? My guess is NOT!

An amendment, to hear I love you everyday.

Oh the Blowhaners are getting pissed and will get even more pissed as jail gets closer and closer! I love seeing them freak out and spin more completely hilarious lies! And with all the lawsuits and legal bills she's been busily digging for herself, she'll never get out of that hole! She is too stupid to ever do the right thing when it counts and she will always pay the price for her stupidity! Bitch is going to jail and if she doesn't shut her smokehole, it's just going to get longer and longer! You fuucktards seem to forget that she's still facing the very same judge who is even more pissed off than when she left! Revel showed her some mercy not sending her right to the clink and look at how Blowhan repaid her- a big FU! It's going to get very, very bad for her and that's how it should be! Suffer hard Blohan!

A lindsay lohan fan has no intelligence at all. They are incapable of realizing that they are rooting for someone who is a lost cause and that the end is near for her. They gravitate to her because they can identify with the fact that just like their idol they are all losers too. At the end of the day they deserve each other because her fans are just exactly like her. Human garbage.

Lindsay will do 4 days and her first interview after will be for over $1M.

What a talent!!!!!!!!!

You should add that the Blowhaners take pride in stealing, scamming, and manipulating their way through their pathetic lives. They take pride in their little junkie criminal because they are like that themselves! Haters work, Blohan fans steal!

Let her get some cash. It's the only way the people she ripped off can ever hope to get their money back. So much for trying to lie and say she's broke! That shit won't fly now!

All you haters are just jealous because Lindsey and Ali are so beautiful and you all are just a bunch of fugly wankers.

3:55, that stool will be white dust long before someone plunks down a red cent for that stinky, corned kernel log.

7:01 LL used to be a somewhat talented actress but she is a parody of her former self now. It will be a looooong time, if ever, before anyone will watch her in a movie and not think of her as the train wreck she really is. Sorry, she is NOT such a good actress to overcome her outrageous and nauseating real life persona.

ʘ‿ʘ

Jealous of a jailbird and her grifter family? HA! How old are your junior league of criminals? 12? Get off the net, cry to mommy, and quit stealing stuff that does not belong to you!

ENJOY FLUFFIN' MUFFINS BEHINDS BARS JAILBIRD!!!

My friend who knows the Lohans told me they sit together with laptops/iphones and post comments on x17 and TMZ because they believe they have to fight haters to get their side of the story out.

jk - Great, one more I'll have to bury.

6:07 PM Do not stop posting here!!!!!!!!!!
I know for a FACT that Lindsay hates what people say in these comments but she still keeps looking cuz she loves to read about herself and then post anonymous comments attacking haters.

To be a blohan fan means that you have to be oblivious to the reality of what is going on with her. Her fans have deluded themselves to the point that they think that their idol is a movie star. She is a has been who thinks that because there are people talking about her that it must mean that she is a star. The only reason that people are paying attention to her is that they are curious as to how it is all going to end. The jealousy claim is the dumbest thing that someone can say in defense of her. No one wants to be one of the most despised people in the world who owes money to everyone with a jail sentence right around the corner who could overdose any day now.

It is so ironic that she blasts other people and gets mad when they do the same to her. Everything she says puts her 4th grade IQ and social skills just right out there, while criticizing others who have valid points. Like a little bratty or special ed kid, always shifting the blame to someone else and acting so self righteous. Her attempts to look so glamorous are making her look even more stupid.

get rich or die trying

Does the jail provide lube to the new arrivals?

ʘ‿ʘ
O

7:01, Dear Dina... I am an actress, have been in movies, have a million and a beautiful life... so shut the H up and quit enabling your child! You are just sickening... why don't you help her! It is obvious that her one time acting is all that is important to you. She is a human being and her being your daughter should be number one in importance. Actresses are not what they used to be... they are now a dime a dozen... so what exactly are you hanging on to this for?

@7:08 Goat, you think someone loves you? Moreover, you think you are capable of inspiring love? Apparently you are more delusional than any of us suspected. You have absolutely nothing to offer a man. You are mentally defective, an unabashed whore, a drunk, a substance abuser, a gold digger, dimwitted, a zealot, a backstabbing ex-wife, a neglectful mother, and a felon awaiting prosecution. You are broken in every conceivable way. In fact you are a burden.

LMFAO @10:58 see a psychiatrist.

LMFAO @4:36 definitely worth the price of admission.

DUH! Slapping myself in the forehead and laughing.

Dr. Drew Offers Lindsay Lohan His Help Because Jail Will Not Break Her Habits

As reported on RadarOnline in an exclusive interview with Dr. Drew Pinsky:

An addiction specialist to the stars, Dr. Drew Pinsky, has singled himself out as the go to guy for advice when a troubled celebrity is nearing that rock bottom place in their life. Lindsay Lohan, the good-girl-gone-bad received a 90 day jail sentence because the judge felt she wasn’t taking her sobriety punishment seriously. Dr. Drew believes that’s not exactly the right approach and may do more harm than good for the starlet.

“Jail will only harden her. I have in the past and I even would be willing to go in front of the judge, if Lindsay asked me to, and ask that she be placed in my care to begin a year long residential treatment, at the minimum. The judge ordered Lindsay to 90 days of treatment, and that just won’t be enough for her sadly.”

“There is always a cause for concern when someone suddenly stops drinking and taking illegal drugs. A person can have medical issues such as withdrawing and going through detox. Someone in that situation should be monitored. However, there are some prescription medications that can block withdrawl symptons. If Lindsay is indeed taking prescription medications such as Adderall, or benzodiazepines I would advise that she abstain from taking those types of medications, as they can impede her recovery process.”

According to Vitals, Dr. David Drew Pinsky is an internist specializing in addiction medicine. He had acquired his MD at the four star University of South California in 1984 and completed his residency training in internal medicine at Huntington Memorial Hospital in Pasadena, CA.

Reliable Source: Lindsay Lohan takes on human rights

To the surprise of anyone who actually studies crime and punishment, Lindsay Lohan weighed in on the subject Wednesday night via Twitter:

"It is clearly stated in Article 5 of the UN Universal Declaration of Human Rights that ..... 'No one shall be subjected to torture or to cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment.' " She then quoted from a 2002 Cato Institute paper by legal scholar Erik Luna decrying unfair sentencing guidelines: "Scores of federal defendants sentenced under a constitutionally perverted ..... system that saps moral judgment through its mechanical rules."

The folks at the D.C.'s libertarian think tank were tickled by the unlikely shoutout, but Cato senior fellow Walter Olsen says the jail-bound actress missed the mark.

"She needs to be more careful in her legal research -- too much time in bars and not enough in law libraries," he told us. The Supreme Court struck down those sentencing guidelines in 2005, and the UN declaration has nothing to do with her case. "Not now or ever has the Geneva Convention protected the right to flip off the judge."

(Speaking of which: Lohan claims the F-bomb inscribed on her middle finger manicure "had nothing to do w/court.")

Anyway, Olsen believes she got a fair hearing. "Compared with the justice most people get, she's been treated gently and carefully," he said. "She's gotten second chances that many people aren't given."

Lohan, sentenced Tuesday to serve 90 days for probation violations, clearly doesn't agree: Her last tweet linked to a Newsweek story about an Iranian woman facing death by stoning.

Mel Gibson Reportedly Dating Lindsay Lohan
Written by Don Fulsom

Drunken, dirty-mouthed anti-Semite Mel Gibson is secretly dating drunken, dirty-mouthed anti-judge Lindsay Lohan, periodically reliable sources suggest. In fact, to show solidarity with Lohan, these sources indicate that if Gibson ever goes to court, he will paint his fingernails with swastikas.

When she was sentenced to prison for alcohol-related offenses, Lohan decorated her fingernails with a vulgar message for the judge this family newspaper can not repeat.

"I'm going to pull something similar as a final career-wrecker, and to impress Lindsay," said Mel. "We actually have a wonderful relationship based on a shared hatred of inferior mortals-including Jews, judges, cops and sobriety advocates."

Before passing out, Gibson slurred: "Both Lindsay and I are bi-sexual, which gives our love life a rich complexity of multi-layered dimensions." Gibson has been attending court-ordered classes at the Clean Language Institute near Hollywood.

From @Joan_Rivers

Lindsay Lohan had "F uck You" painted on her nails. What people don't know is that the judge had "Eat me you party skank," painted on hers. 2:14 PM Jul 9th via web

I was just reading about the new Lindsay Lohan diet, which is all liquid. 80 Proof. 11:44 AM Jul 9th via web

Lindsay Lohan is so dumb. Her idea of being sworn in is cursing at the judge. 11:38 AM Jul 9th via web

Lindsay Lohan said she wouldn't mind being under oath because she thought Oath was a Norwegian ski instructor. 10:57 AM Jul 9th via web

Best line: "You good for nothing demonic no talent white trash whore." - Once A Cokehead Always A Cokehead

A CATO senior fellow, Joan River and Once A Cokehead Always A Cokehead joined forces to inform Lindsanity she’s an idiot. Remarkable!

/Rivers

Lindsay is a strong girl and nothing is going to bring her down.She WILL make the huge come back after these 60 days because she deserves to be happy. I am sure she knows that she has many many supporters around her.

the day this racist, drugged out asshole has a comeback is the same day that Roman Polanski is given a Nobel Peace Prize for his efforts in women's rights! There will always be those that root for bad people, but luckily this is always going to be a small group of mouth breathing lunatics.

Supporters, enablers, toe-may-toe, toe-mah-toe. You’re too boring for another reply.

At this time next week, Lindsay will be in jail.

My 2:07 was for 1:38.

My new year's resolution is to stop letting the lucky few that have my heart, try2constantly tear me down.

2010 is about moving forward, not backwards. Leaving the bad (people, habits, and negative energy behind) time to make changes-right!?!? (sic)"

Lindsay Lohan, January 2010

"dang, guess samantha isn't anywhere near LL right now..."

"that's not a bad thing. they aren't joined at the hip."

"But they should until LL goes to jail for a while"!

"are you 5?

they still have to do their work. I'm sure lindsay has been having meetings and putting things in order before she goes to jail. they still have plenty of time to be together before she goes. besides samantha can still visit lindsay while she's in jail and when she's in rehab."

Sorry 2:14, I'm preoccupied. Be back in a few.

Sorry again. I had to send an important message to a friend.

LL wants to have baby with SR.





...there are no words.....

I'm so glad L Chatters let us know they're Siamese Lesbians. We have to rewrite the next edition.

Lindsay Lohan Mayhem 2010-2011 will be touring the Lynwood Correctional Facility beginning on July 20, 2010.

2:35 we don't include freak shows in 2010.

Sorry I have to break away for a few more minutes.

6 days left.

The 1:38 comment is creepy.

All done. Where were we?

@use the link.

I love Bonnie Fuller's story about her comparing her “victim hood” to an Iranian woman facing torture and death. It's the same narcissistic, arrogant, self-serving behavior she displayed during the BBC3 India documentary. Fuller’s story reminds me of the comments here.

HA! That should say NOT Siamese Lesbians. But you never know, maybe L Chatters can concoct a plan to have them fused together.

LOL....as if the A-list L.A. and NYC entertainment circles needed more reasons to shun and snicker at Lindsay (and now Sam, who had been thought to be somewhat smart.)

Will Linds be able to tweet from jail & rehab??

Hi 4:39. No, deleted twittercides in jail. I don't know about rehab.

Of course 2:52 AM. Every nice comment is creepy.

where is that b*tch maria...now i want to know what she thinks about our famus LiLo......WHERRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEE AAAAAAARRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!11

“Lindsay actually wants to open up her own rehab center here (in Los Angeles) and a couple across the country to help other kids and celebs so they don’t fall through the cracks in this town,” Dina said. “She mentioned it to me a couple of days ago. She’s really growing up.”

-Dina interviewed 2 days ago.

Widdle mari-a's in Kenfucky drawing with crayon in a polisci textbook.

Sherry's pissing down her leg.

When a 46-year-old mom wants to take her daughters out for a special night, a Hollywood nightclub might seem a curious choice.

Not so for Dina Lohan, who took Lindsay, 22, and Ali, 15, to Villa on March 25.

“Do you know who I am?” Dina protested when they were turned away at the door because of Ali’s age. “You’re making a huge mistake."

"Huge!” Lindsay added.

“Lindsay has her 6126 clothing line which is doing amazing. We’re in Neiman Marcus, Bloomingdales… she designs everything from soup to nuts.” -Dina Lohan


tee hee--How much would you pay for “Blohan Peanuts”? How about “Lindsay’s Tomato Bisque, With Crack”? Or “The Milkaholic’s Clam Chowder”?

www.babble com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/2009/04/lindsay-lohan-drinking-again-with-mom.jpg

Sherry is not Maria. They are two different nutjobs. Maria is a huge fan of the Lohans.

5:49 thanks!!

Loved the pic posted showing Dina Lohan really being there for Lindsay after her last release from rehab a couplle of years ago.

Dina looked on as Lindsay picked up a bottle of Belvedere and chug it.





I wish my mom was there for me, just like that.

@Heads up!

5:50 you're talking out of your ass.

http://www.youtube com/watch?v=5_g5ieyZE8g

" Lindsay Lohan ''I am Gonna Stay Sober'' 2007"


Priceless.

Hey crazy Kentucky bitch!!!

What's your middle name???

!!!!!! Lilo shares that her 21st Birthday was her first sober one ever. Cool!!!!

5:53 your family and friends turned their back on you.

Sherry, remember when you were still posing as 20-something kira and said Sherry sounded like the name of a 40 yr old? Watching you get caught in your lies is hilarious!!!

Sherry @6:01 you're other alt is laying low. How's the new one working out? Not so good, huh?

Lindsay says she'd like to be a mom someday. "At some point I want to adopt a kid as well," she says. "A child in need or a newborn from another country. I'm not sure."

Marie Claire interview

Ack! *your* other alt.........

Lindsay should adopt Sherry's kid. It doesn't have a mom.

SamRo and Lilo can have an untouchables wedding. Speaky can hook them up.

You should focus on your people skills.

(breaks down and smothers insane little baby with kisses)

@6:18 Sherry, I'm getting married.

"Lindsay will always keep growing. She'll do a film and get an Academy Award, and no one will remember her boobs. "

Dina Lohan

Schizoid Sherry, I mean herb, how many voices do you hear in your head? Is it one for every alt? Or one for every mood?

LMFAO Sherry got caught lying again and out pops her herb alt. You are pathetic.

It's the bianary & hex that really throw me for a loop, that's when I grab the foil.

I can't believe she was begging him to say I loves you. Doesn't she know how long they've been together?

No, and it’s none of her business.

6:28 - The less said on here the better. She’s like Blohan. She cheapens everything she touches.

6:29 Gotcha.

Lawd Sherry's making a tin foil hat @ 6:28. lol

Thanks 6:32.

Stuff like 6:18 am sounds weird coming from a middle-aged hag with a kid. Yuck.

Lets catch up over there, so we can talk without her watching.

Remember this place is for fun only. Keep private talk, private.

Ohhh, the slutty voice.

(the old salt must have lost it's heat...hahahaha)

(ox)

Sherry,

Describe his gorgeous eyes and the sound of his voice when he said I love you.

No? That's right because you don‘t know him. I could tell you but I won’t because you are an irrelevant stranger.

Don't be bitter Sherry. Find someone in Kentucky. Don't you know any nice shoe salesmen?

Speaky's been living in a fantasyland. She's needs to get on with some sorta real life. We've been telling her that over and over. She's stubborn and really messed up in the head. Like who tries to force someone they never met to love them? This shit ain't normal.

7:10 I know but it’s her problem not ours or anyone else's problem. We stopped talking about her craziness here because she thrives on the negative attention.

@7:13 Yea we try doing the same. It’s hard with the trolling though. She wears on my nerves and I know I'm not alone on that.

6:58 I'm dying to see your engagement ring!! Email me!!

ot -Just finished a little 128 part harmony, wanna give it a go?

(pay particular attention to the bridge)

muah(!)

@144 - No actually they do not have sliding bar gates for each cell door. The cell doors are actually metal with a small window.

@144 - No actually they do not have sliding bar gates for each cell door. The cell doors are actually metal with a small window.

Crap, email me at @op-- (you know)

Lawd Sherry's gonna sing in a tin foil hat lol

God could you be any more pathetic 7:21? Yeah, sure sing, like someone can hear you or cares what you do. For reals no one does. Knock yourself out.

The guys who called her on her shit rock!!!

Uhhh hello? You wanted to sing, right crazy? Start squeaking. We don’t have all day ya know.

7:31 NOOOOOOOO!!! Don't encourage it to sing. lmao

Sorry guys, should be good for the LOLs ya know.

7:20-7:22 Check your email. I sent two from the night he proposed. It’s almost as gorgeous as him. Almost but not quite. ;)

Isn't Ali's 40th birthday coming up next month?

please add to haters list:

Mark Ronson
Charlotte Ronson
Ann Dexter-Jones
Mick Jones
Judge Judy
Emanuel Ungaro
LAPD
MADD

thank you.

God luck to the hell on 20 juli 2010 and enjoy with the worst award to Dina and Michael Lohan being parents.

Six more days until jail,Lindsay.
Apparently the Lohans can't find a lawyer who wants to take on this mess pro bono.

- Hollywood directors
- Hollywood actors
- The entire music industry
- The whole fashion industy (minus tranny fashion market)
- Lesbian jail gangs
- 96% of the general public
- All non-racists
- Friends and family of DUI victims
- People who watched her movies
- People who heard her music
- Judge Revel
- Danette Meyers
- All media outlets
- Mark Ronson
- Charlotte Ronson
- Ann Dexter-Jones
- Mick Jones
- Judge Judy
- Emanuel Ungaro
- LAPD
- MADD

kudos to LL for lying low the past day. she is practicing doing without:

phones,
photographers,
iPads,
laptops,
mom,
twitter,
makeup,
"work",(i.e.soft-porn photoshoots)
CIGARETTES,
junk food,
hair stuff,
special attention,
sycophants,
drivers,
assistants,
credit cards,
new clothes,
passports,
babysitters,
bi-weekly Botox injections,
lesbo hook-ups,(well, maybe not)
high-end substances,
and extraneous celebrity crap.

LOL Bloho---- made it onto the cover of German GQ magazine.

NOT the German Vogue, as all her little L Chat tweenies thought.

GQ means Gentelman's Quarterly, little dykie wannabes!

"Such an amazing day today! Had a photo shoot then went on a major shopping spree at al my favorites stores in Paris. Went to Herve Leger, Louis Vuitton, Balmain, YSL and Christian Dior. Got so many amazing pieces. I love the fashion in Paris, absolutely stunning! Love it!"
-Paris Hilton







Lindsay....Fail. Again.

- L Chat OCD lesbian loosers
- Small fan base in Chile and Bulgaria (10-20 people)
- Right On Programs (being investigated for falsifiying records)
- Racists
- Dinasaur
- Ali 'I auditioned for a porno director at 13' Lohan
- Cameramen and sound guys for Inferno

"What are Lindsay’s goals for the future?
Dina Blohan: Lindsay actually wants to open up her own rehab center here [in LA] and a couple across the country to help other kids and celebs so they don’t fall through the cracks in this town. She mentioned it to me a couple of days ago. She’s really growing up."

Forecast for Hell, ice storms and heavy snow. Snow chains required.

Hurry!! Just a few more days to choose a gift from the Lindsay Lohan "Going to Prison" Gift Registry:

-Small mirror, along with a shank in the shape of a razor blade

-Velvet rope in place of bars.

-Los Angeles Sparks underwear.

-Furry handcuffs.

-Pruno cocktail set.

-Custom F-U acrylic nails

-Edible underwear

-Do-It-Yourself-Botox Treatments (the 90 day Handi-Pac)

-Collapsible Stripper Pole

-Do-It-Yourself-Industrial-Strength- Lip-Plumper-Kit

- Superduty, crotch crustacean resistant, cheese resistant, anti-bacterial soap shaped into a dildo a.k.a- Agent Orange (A Lohan personal cleansing/crotch defoliant device)

- Commercial-strength dental dams for her shower buddies.

- Empty shoes box for hoarding dirty tissues

According to a source close to the situation, the “Mean Girls” starlet thinks there is no way she should have to do time behind bars, and is only willing to work with a lawyer who agrees that filing an appeal is the best approach.

“Lindsay is surrounded by all these so-called friends who keep wrapping her in cotton wool and telling her that she did nothing wrong and this is all so unfair and she must file an appeal,” said our insider.

“It’s a lost cause, she won’t listen to anybody unless they tell her she is an innocent."

According to Santa Monica Criminal Defense Attorney, Steve Cron, Lohan’s unrelenting desire to file an appeal is merely delaying the inevitable.

“Lindsay’s chances of succeeding with an appeal are virtually zero regardless of who her attorney is,” Cron said. “She will waste a lot more money in the process and just be back at where she started.”

And it certainly doesn’t sound as though Lohan can afford to write any more checks, given the speculation that surrounds her dire financial situation.

“She is already a couple of million dollars in debt,” added another source. “She just isn’t living in the real world.”

I was gonna post but then I read that..
only a couple a million?

(can't...say it...)

"I thought it was supposed to be for German VOGUE!?!?!??!"

"ikr... WHATERRRR I'LL TAKE IT"

Gift Registry, I love it! :)

8:14 That’s good news, thanks.

6:51 Forecast for Hell, ice storms and heavy snow. Snow chains required.

We needed a Blohan dysfunction forecaster. Wherever she goes there’s white powdery snow!

Maybe Dina can get Lindsay a Fudgie the prisoner cake at Carvel...oh wait they kicked her out of there.

Machete is going to be her comeback...oh wait she'll still be in jail or rehab or jail-hab when the movie premieres in October...oh well.

:)

L Chat update!!!

My crystal ball just told me that Samantha went straight home after work, had dinner with LL, walked Caddy, and now she's having sexy time with LL and the AC is not working.

LOL Bloho---- made it onto the cover of German GQ magazine.

NOT the German Vogue, as all her little L Chat tweenies thought.

GQ means Gentelman's Quarterly, little dykie wannabes!

"I hope lindsay isn't moving out of EW."

"is this just temporary residence or so people actually live there?"

it's like a group home.

"So would she have to live there and stay at night.
So that would mean no sleepovers for Rohan?

Or could she leave at night?"

What did you expect?

You commissioned the best.

no sleepovers for Rohan...no sleepovers for Rohan....no sleepovers for Rohan


How will the world survive?

so effn wrong